Yay Fall!

We may not have THAT many fiery red or vibrant orange trees, but we certainly have some pretty trees. As much as I love springtime green against the blue sky, I loooveee orange, yellow, and red against the blue sky too!



Go take a walk! Who knows how many more beautiful, brisk fall days we have left!

PS I am not a fan of photographers/photo editors adding sun spots or rays after the fact so I just had to clarify that the photo above is unretouched. :)

ok ok I may have adjusted my contrast a bit but that's all!

Us.

We used a tripod, self timer, lots of patience, and lots of energy. I think our result was pretty allright! I still want to get some engagement shots next spring through the company I work for but we just wanted to see if I could make it work being both the subject and the photographer.

I'm still very excited to show off our save the dates... I just hate the labeling process so I've been slacking. Sorrrrrrry. Hopefully soon :)

p.s.

I cannot WAIT to show the blog world our Save the Date project!! I cannot post anything about it until they are actually sent out but


ahhhhhh


I love them! :)

Blah-xiety

This post over at Color Me Katie prompted this posting of a self portrait. And an explanation to go with it I suppose.

For the past couple months, I have been struggling with anxiety off and on. Mostly it will hit around 3 oclock, while I'm at work figuring out what tasks will finish up the rest of my day. I've noticed a few things that seem to incite the same tightening, less-than-panic-but-more-than-calm, uncomfortable feelings.

And they are weird!

First, this blog. Have you taken a look at all the blogs I follow? I used to LOVE looking through all of them. I would take my time picking through each and every one of them - feeling inspired, creative, and relaxed. The first time I felt this 'anxiety' while browsing through my favorite blogs, I remember thinking, "Now this is weird."

Is it that I don't want to miss any? Is it that I feel intimidated by everyone else's greatness and creativity? Is it that I am forcing myself to enjoy something I may not find enjoyment in anymore?

Maybe. Maybe. No.

Blog-xiety? heh...

The other circumstance I find to be anxiety-provoking is the process of placing a lab order at the end of the day. This is odd, but hang with me for a minute. Around 3, when the pressure of the day is wearing thick, when the lunch I enjoyed is starting to put me to sleep, and when the mounting general annoyance of the office hits sky high, I begin to plan out the remaining 2 hours. Usually, I finish up a few photo-retouches and prepare them for a lab order.

Ok seriously, just trying to explain this is giving me hives. Hah... All you need to understand I guess is that it's not a stressful task but my mind seems to think I need to be panicky about it.

Whyyyyyy do I have to put up with these stupid feelings? Why does my heart pound and my breath catch for any other reason than seeing my fiance (ahhh cheesy, but I had to throw it in there!) Why do I feel like something is horribly horribly wrong when I know that it's not!?

Mom says it's hormonal. Well I say it's ANNOYING!

Give me back rationality! Give me back my generally calm demeanor! Give me back my afternoons!

And go AWAY anxiety! Off with you!

Bruised

I just wrote two paragraphs on pain. Embarrassed myself, deleted it, and wrote this. Now here I am, feeling pretty crappy about this blog, among other things.

Why do I start things I can't finish?

Why do I promise things I can't deliver?

Why do I let myself let myself down time after time. And yes, I meant let myself let myself.

Why do I feel this weight of the world on my shoulders one minute and then have it disappear the next? Why, when it's bearing down on me, do I desperately want to do something about it but feel far too mentally wiped out to do anything at all?

Why is work so hard?

And why, oh why, am I writing this out in a place that is so public?

Hmm..

Maybe you feel it too. It's nice to know you're not alone.

Zesty!

Ugh, I worked 10 hours today. Up and down the stairs, answering phones, and spending some quality and not so quality time with my good friend Photoshop. Some days when I walk out the back door at 5, 6, 7ish PM, my brain is literally throbbing from all of the multi-tasking, computer staring, and workflow organizing I do throughout the day. Today was one of those days.

I thought the last thing I would want to do is sit in front of my [superior] home computer and spend more time with Photoshop. So I didn't. I watched some HGTV, even took a power nap during "My First Place." But then I heard my name.

Rachel!

Rachel! :crinkle crinkle: Rachel!

RACHEL!

It was my new Photoshop User mag, still in plastic packaging (hence the crinkling) sitting all by its lonesome on top of my coffee table. In all fairness, it was in good company with my unread Rachael Ray and Vogue mags.

Well anyway, I gave in to that little voice, ripped off the plastic, and started rifling through the pages. You can guess what happened next... Yep, I sat down at my computer and start playing.

Warning: these photos are ROUGH and literally just for fun. Please don't judge me on my sloppy extractions or poor creative ideas.



I spent some time looking for arrows, but they are all too clip-art-ish or ridiculous. Wouldn't it look cooler with an arrow in the wood right where he's looking? Shout out to Eric for being such a great subject!



Googly eyes are back. This one is a little silly but I liked the overall feel of it. The orange in front is lacking something. It needs something else to give it the UMPH it needs. But I'm not too unhappy with it - I'm unveiling it here aren't I?

So my head hurts a LOT now. Time for bed.

bookcases.

Are your bookcases crooked and relatively pointless?



Reminiscent of a geometric pattern?



Featuring an alternate purpose such as climbing to another level of your house?




Ridiculously sorted in a pretty neat looking rainbow pattern but impossible for ever finding the book you want simply because you cannot recall the color of the binding?



Cleverly placed behind a decorative curtain with a ladder for the tall shelves?


Ooooo I've always wanted bookcases that require the use of a ladder. I can't wait to have my own home so I can take advantage of some of these amazing uses of the things-that-hold-my-precious-books. My semi-obsessiveness probably wouldn't allow for color coding because you have the size difference problem, not to mention the fact that I wouldn't have any (ahem, many) books in black, brown, or red. Also, what do to when you have more than one book by the same author? You can't tear them apart! Atrocious.

No, no. I won't be color coding. But I can appreciate those who do.

I'll just be dreaming of a shelf so high I must roll the ladder out from behind the decorative curtain, climb 2 to 3 rungs high, and comfortably pull out my non-dog eared copy of (fill in the blank here) then proceed to lounge on my extra comfy couch for a nice little reading session.

Sigh.


All images found via google image search of "bookcases" "bookcase" or "color coordinated bookcase."

Scars & Work

I've been doing a lot of retouching at work these days since I am now in charge of all of our orders. So pretty much all day I go from file to file, face to face, using the clone, healing, and patch tools over and overrrr again. Fun right?

Well what starts happening when you do this day in and day out? You see people with under eye bags, and you want to pull out your tablet, hit 'S' on lighten at 20% opacity and just swoooop under the eyes a couple times. Voila!

Only, it doesn't work in real life. Darn.

So I came to a realization that when Eric and I get married and someone somewhere spends a couple days processing our images (ok who am I kidding, it will probably be me) what will they take out as blemishes/flaws and what will they leave in?

If you scroll down to the last posting you'll see a photo of Eric and I. I did NO retouching to the image. Not because there's none to be done, but because I loved the photo and didn't want to spend the time obsessing. Anyway, Eric has these adorable little freckles scattered across his face. An average retoucher would probably not remove them all but would certainly lighten them and remove about 40-50% of them. Also, you may notice I have scars on my forehead.. See below:





I had chicken pox, and instead of heeding the warnings of all the adults around me, I scratched the big one right on my forehead. A decent sized circular 'pit' (official term) is what I was left with for that indiscretion.

I also walked into a coffee table when I was a toddler. Mom calls it walking into, Dad calls it fell onto. Either way, silly me. A half moon shaped scar from the stitches sits pleasantly next to the circular pit.

On my 6th birthday, I fell onto a filing cabinet. I remember it vividly. I thought it was a great idea to get up on the dining room chair to reach for the festive birthday balloons, lost my balance and !%WHAM#@! Forehead smacked into the corner of the metal filing cabinet (for some reason located in the dining room? Confusion.) 5 stitches later, we were walking into the parking garage of the ER and my dad says,

"So, it's your 6th birthday..."

yea?

"And you got 5 stitches..."

ok?

"Why don't we go back in for another so you can have 6 stitches on your 6th birthday!"

I'm pretty sure I cried.

Soooo anyway, my point is coming. Mom always said I had such a giant forehead it had to hit everything first when I fell. I'd say that is kind of embarrassing, but hey, it's part of who I am! Scars and all. Freckles and moles and all.

So retouchers beware! Sometimes you may find people content with their imperfections, flaws, or scars.

Sometimes it just adds to the story of how we came to be who we are today.

PS

1. We did organize, clean, and re-arrange my room. It's now a joy to spend time in here (instead of a stress!)

2. We had a wonderful dinner with Mom on her birthday. It was an excellent evening. We made spitfire shrimp with whole wheat fettucine noodles.

3. I did not make it to the gym 4 times. I'm ashamed. Next week, I swearrrr!

4. I didn't make too many lists. Phew.

5. What else was I supposed to do?

6. Oh yea, passport.. Didn't happen.

7. Also did not blog. Sigh. What is wrong with me?

Our studio manager at work, Lauren, had her baby on Thursday and everything just happened so fast! She had a beautiful baby girl and we are so excited to see more photos and get a visit sometime :)

So these next few weeks are going to be really crazy for me. Bear with me.

Love him.

I'm a lucky girl.